I was grumpy with my son last night. I hate when I get that way because of what is going on in my head. I put him to bed and then curled up in my own bed and began to think. I began to think about apologies and how important they are and, how the lack of an apology can be just as devastating as whatever it is that needed the apology in the first place. And I began to think about how a sincere- truly sincere apology can be, well, magical. It can make the hurt go away and make you feel as if someone has wrapped you safely in a warm blanket after being chilled.
When my son woke this morning, I cuddled up next to him and apologized- a sincere, heart-felt sorry. He looked at me and said, “You don’t have to apologize, Mom. I know you didn’t mean it.” Wow. Later that morning my youngest threw my eldest’s breakfast on the floor. This, of course, incited a small crisis between the two of them. Wisely thinking, my youngest retreated into his room for a bit and when he reappeared he went right up to his brother and said, “Sorry, C.” I held my breath an hoped that my son would do what we practiced- just say, “Thank you.” (We never say, “It’s okay” because it is often not okay, but simply saying, “Thank you” works) I hoped that he would not turn his back on this apology nor give his brother an evil, unforgiving look. And he didn’t. He looked his little brother right in the eye and said, “Thanks, T.” Wow. Proof positive that a sincere apology is magical.
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